If you’re newly diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis (RA), waiting for medication to kick in, or not on treatment yet, and you find yourself stuck in a severe, prolonged flare, this post is for you.
My name is Ellen, and I was diagnosed with RA in 2010 when I was just 18 years old. Everything I’m sharing here is what I wish someone had told me back then. It’s honest, practical, and grounded in lived experience.
Before we dive in, there’s one important truth we need to talk about.
Most of the time, getting serious relief from a severe flare will require a visit to your rheumatologist. In my experience there is nothing over-the-counter that can provide significant relief when I'm in a prolonged flare.
A flare will either:
Over-the-counter remedies usually don’t help in the way we desperately hope they will. That said, while none of the tools below will end a flare on their own, layering them together can make the experience more tolerable. It's always better to do something than nothing. I like to think of it like making a lasagna. Each layer matters. (For the sake of this post I'm also going to assume that additional movement or exercise is not an option, though exercise is one of the few proven OTC treatment options that can make a significant positive difference for patients.)
The first layer is making sure you have some form of pain relief in your system.
For autoimmune diseases like RA, NSAIDs (nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs) are often the go-to. Always check with your doctor to make sure they’re safe for you. There are other pain management options, such as medical cannabis (the ONLY pain relief that truly helped me), and prescription NSAIDS available through your primary care doctor.
The key takeaway: don’t try to muscle through a flare with nothing on board. Stay on top of them even if it feels pointless.
Next, add a topical layer.
Topical creams work best on joints that are close to the surface, such as:
Examples include:
These products don’t eliminate pain, but the hot or cold sensations can help distract your nervous system.
Heat and ice can be incredibly helpful, but they’re very individual.
Some joints respond well to heat, others to cold, and it can even change from flare to flare. For example:
The rule is simple: if it makes things worse, stop. These tools are meant to bring relief, not push through discomfort.
When you’re facing hours — or nights — of flare pain, your environment matters.
Think about the positions that feel least painful for your joints and help yourself stay there. You can use:
Prop joints at supportive angles, especially if you’re trying to rest or sleep. Small adjustments can make a surprisingly big difference.
There is an entire world of tools designed to make life easier for people with limited mobility — and you deserve access to them.
Some examples include:
These items can be expensive, and it takes time to build a collection. If possible, try setting aside $15–$20 a month to slowly invest in tools that reduce daily strain. Over time, they add up — and they matter.
This last layer is often underestimated — but it’s powerful.
Techniques like:
can significantly reduce perceived pain.
This doesn’t mean the pain is “all in your head.” It means that anxiety, stress, and tension amplify pain signals. Calming your nervous system can lower the volume.
Sleep is one of the most important tools you have when living with chronic illness. Visualization exercises, guided meditation, or ASMR can help your body settle enough to rest.
The goal is simple: create moments where you forget about your flare — even briefly.
If you’re new to RA, I hope this helped you feel a little less alone and a little more equipped.
And if you’re a seasoned veteran, I’d love to hear from you. What tools or strategies help you survive flares?
You can visit the downloads page for downloadable handouts — easy-to-read resources you can share with friends, family, or keep for yourself.
You deserve support. You deserve comfort. And you deserve tools that help you get through the hardest days.
Meet Ellen, a chronic illness advocate and the founder of Flare Family. Since developing Rheumatoid Arthritis in 2010, she's dedicated herself to empowering others navigating similar journeys through her TikTok account, @ellenwitharthritis. Led by compassion, she is working to build a community where everyone feels heard, understood, and uplifted.
Ellen is a graphic and web designer who enjoys spending time with her partner, Jarrod, and soul dog, Dolly. Her not so guilty pleasures are Bravo reality shows, donuts, and finding great hiking spots.
Have questions about Flare Family? Need advice about living with Rheumatoid Arthritis? I'm here to connect with you and answer your questions!
Are you a writer? Do you have a story to tell or advice to give? I'm always looking for guest authors. If you're interested in writing a blog post for Flare Family, contact me via email or this form.
ellenwitharthritis@gmail.com
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